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divorceguy
Newbie
Posts: 5
Registered: 12-03-2007 Location:
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posted on 12-09-2007 at 00:22 |
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When is separation the appropriate course?
Before you think about separation, ask yourself if you've taken all reasonable steps to make the marriage or home situation better by working together. Did you try sitting down calmly with your spouse to discuss the situation? Did you try counseling, either individually or as a couple? Talking to a psychologist, social worker, pastor, or trusted family friend may provide the necessary medium for working out differences.
If you have children, consider the impact of staying (or leaving) on them. And never bring them into the fight. Always remember: Children may be resilient, but their armor is only so thick. Children know more, see more and hear more than you think. If staying together is creating an emotionally troubling situation for them, perhaps separation is the best option.
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XO_stepdad
Member
Posts: 28
Registered: 01-06-2010 Location:
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posted on 02-19-2010 at 15:57 |
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nice advice
--------------Before you think about separation, ask yourself if you've taken all reasonable steps to make the marriage or home situation better by working together. Did you try sitting down calmly with your spouse to discuss the situation? Did you try counseling, either individually or as a couple? Talking to a psychologist, social worker, pastor, or trusted family friend may provide the necessary medium for working out differences.
If you have children, consider the impact of staying (or leaving) on them. And never bring them into the fight. Always remember: Children may be resilient, but their armor is only so thick. Children know more, see more and hear more than you think. If staying together is creating an emotionally troubling situation for them, perhaps separation is the best option. -------------------
I think this is great advice you have covered a lot of good points. I think the most important thing you mentioned is keeping the children in mind. When you have kids involved in a possible or ongoing divorce it is most important to put them first because they are innocently being put in a damaging situation.
Parents who are divorcing should make sure and keep interacting with their kids all the time. the worst thing would be if they have a problem or a misconception about what is happening and simply keep it bottled up inside. Some kids may need therapy to deal with the divorce in a healthy way but no matter what don't lose sight of what is most important
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XO_stepdad
Member
Posts: 28
Registered: 01-06-2010 Location:
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posted on 05-11-2010 at 09:28 |
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What else can be done?
I agree that divorce is not the last option in all cases and that spending some time living apart could go a long way in bringing two people back together.
scharlie, you said that divorce is not the final option even after living apart etc...What other options are there?
I mean, I understand that people can try counseling, but it gets to a certain point where further efforts are pointless. It's a sad fact and a hard thing for people to come to terms with, but it is better to acknowledge your sadness and change it than to just live with it.
again, I am just wondering what other things you believe couples can do when they feel like there is nothing that will save their relationship.
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